Positively Identifying Domestic Violence and Abuse

Over many years, a lot has been said about the need of bringing an end to domestic violence in our communities. But the reality is that since this form of abuse tends to take place behind closed doors, the subject never makes it out into the open. What’s even worse is that our very own society tries to hush up those who are going through trauma.

Thus, the victims remain muted; take the blame upon them for deserving abusive behavior or just accept it as a normal part of life. Through coercion, manipulation, and physical threats, the abuser takes complete control over the life of the abused.

It is because of these reasons it’s important that you know how to identify the signs of domestic violence and abuse before it gets too late.

How to positively identify the signs of domestic violence and abuse

Sign 1: Isolation

Almost all sorts of abuse, physical or mental, start off with the abuser trying to cut off the victim from his/her friends and family. The abuser projects an image that they are the ones who are being victimized because of the actual victim’s interaction with his/her social circle. If the abuser is successful in isolating the victim, mental torture usually follows.

Sign 2: Victim blaming and “Gas lighting.”

Once the victim has nowhere to go and nobody to turn to for help, the abuser begins mental manipulation by reinforcing the belief that the abused person in the wrong. The term “gas lighting” refers to the act of manipulating someone to doubt their own sanity. The abuser does this to their target to break their will and maintain his/her position of authority.

Sign 3: Physical threats and violence

This is often considered as the most extreme form of domestic abuse because the abuser inflicts bodily harm to his/her victim to be in control. It is at this point that most victims realize that they are or were being abused all along. Unfortunately, not everyone can leave from this dysfunctional relationship in pursuit of a new life.

Other types of domestic abuse

If you’re in a relationship or married to a person who always shows signs of superiority, pettiness, deceit, and replies with sarcasm, then something in your relationship is not right. The chances are that you’re enduring the domestic abuse of a different kind that’s very hard to bring into the light.

Apart from the three signs mentioned above, you should also be wary of stalking as it also counts as a form of abuse. Luckily, North Carolina has strict laws to prosecute abusers of all kinds, so you can go check out the steps to filing a restraining order in NC if you think you’re being subjected to abuse.


Regardless of your decision to leave or stay in an abusive relationship, you can remain confident that your partner’s behavior is very unlikely to change. Don’t take our word for it; scientific research has proved time and again that abusers can hardly reform themselves even after months of counseling. Take precautions early or you too may become a victim of these heinous crimes.